Insanity Stains the Hands of the Innocent
by MiStReSsOfDiSaStEr16
Summary: Dark. Very dark. Mostly Ryou...he does something bad. Very bad. This is how I think Ryou feels about certain things...


Hey there dudes and dudettes. This is my first ficcy on this site. It's also the first thing I've ever written in my life that I've been proud of, so be nice. Also, I'm warning you now. IF YOU HAVE ANY DEEP FEELINGS FOR YUGI MUTOU, DISCONTINUE READING THIS!! THAT MEANS TURN BACK! NOW! I'M WARNING YOUUUU. OK, HAVE IT YOUR WAY. If you're still here, I hope you enjoy this. This is short of a really long one-shot, because it'd be stupid if it was only 2 chapters long. Ok, here goes. RYOU! Disclaimer, please!

Ryou: Miss E owns nothing. Not even me. So I'm a free man!

Me: Dang...Umm...on with the fic...

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Insanity Stains the Hands of the Innocent

Ryou Bakura sat alone in his darkened bedroom, staring at the dimly glowing Millennium Ring in his hands. Rain pounded the windows, and every so often, thunder broke the eerie silence. Moonlight filtered through the window on Ryou's still, pale form. His wide, brown eyes were focused unblinkingly on the golden Item before him. He'd gotten it four years ago, four years after his mother and younger sister had been killed in a car accident. Ryou often wondered why it hadn't been_ him_ in the car that day instead of his sister, that way he would have died and she would have lived. Since the day of the accident, Ryou wished that his sister and mother would come back to life. When that didn't work, he wished _he'd_ die. Ryou knew he'd never kill himself, and wishing for it isn't exactly committing suicide, is it? In any case, Ryou was still waiting for his wish to come true.

He began to wonder about the powers the Millennium Ring had, since it seemed to do more than the other Items. It was able to extract someone's soul and place it in any inanimate object; it could find virtually anything; erase a person's mind; and the power that Ryou's yami enjoyed the most, the Ring could send people to the "dreaded" Shadow Realm. Ryou didn't understand why it was "dreaded." All it was made of was darkness, so unless you have an overwhelming fear of the dark, the Shadow Realm didn't sound too bad. His yami assured him it was much more that simple, everyday darkness, though.

Contrary to everyone's belief, Ryou got along quite well with his yami, Bakura. Those who knew of Bakura thought of him as the "evil spirit of the Millennium Ring," but he was more than that. And, in Ryou's opinion, Bakura was only evil when somebody stood between him and what he desired. When Ryou's friends' souls had been trapped within their favorite Duel Monsters cards back in Duelist Kingdom, Bakura claimed that he was going to restore everyone once he got the Millennium Puzzle from Yugi. Unfortunately, the spirit of Yugi's Millennium Puzzle, Yami, interfered with the plan, forcing Bakura into a duel. He and Ryou came up with an alternate plan, however. Bakura trapped Ryou's soul in the Change of Heart card, and when he was played, Ryou possessed one of Bakura's monsters and told Yugi to attack him. At this point, Yami once again intervened, sending Bakura to the Shadow Realm. But along with being able to send people _to _the Shadow Realm, Bakura also held the rare knowledge of how to _escape _ from there, as well. He returned, and began creating a new strategy to obtain the Millennium Puzzle. Bakura and Ryou weren't exactly friends- their relationship was one of mutualism, where both parties benefited from one another. Bakura gained a body with which he could do his work, and Ryou in turn gained protection from a highly skilled and very powerful defender. Although they helped each other, they were nowhere near as close as Yugi and Yami were.

_Yugi._ Ryou frowned slightly and narrowed his eyes at the thought of the spiky-haired boy. He was what Ryou envied. He had a loyal legion of friends, and he was the one everyone turned to for help in everything. Yugi didn't realize that nearly everybody considered him to be a demigod of sorts. He was too naive to see what Ryou saw in him. But what Ryou envied most about Yugi Mutou was the fact that he _always_ came out on top. No matter what the situation, no matter how dire the circumstances, no matter how bleak things looked, Yugi found some amazing way to defy the odds and come shining through in the end. Granted, Yami helped a lot, which made him no better than his young counterpart. The only difference between the two was that Yami knew full-well he was above every other being on Earth, and although he tried to hide it, it clearly showed. It showed in his overly-confident smirk, his cocky laugh. Yami was able to constantly maintain limitless sangfroid in all his conflicts because he knew he would defeat his opponent and be victorious. His level of self-assurance gnawed and burned at Ryou's insides, threatening to tear him apart. It made Ryou want to scream out his feelings to Yami, but he knew he had to exert some self-control upon himself. If Ryou did such a thing, it would be out-of-character for one who was seemingly so innocent, and it would cause his "friends" to think he was being possessed by Bakura, and they'd throw away the Millennium Ring, as they once did. Then once the Ring worked its way back to Ryou, Bakura would yell at him for being careless. In order to avoid such complications, Ryou kept his comments about Yami, Yugi, and everything else to himself. His urge to confront Yugi about his feelings beat strongly within him, though.

_/ Silence them.../ _whispered a voice in the back of Ryou's mind. _/Silence them forever./_

The voice was quiet, yet firm in its command. Ryou considered following its order for a moment, then shook his head.

_/ No,/_ he thought. _/ I'm not a murderer./_

_/ Not true. You're slowly killing yourself, by allowing your feelings and insanities to overcome and control you./ _The nagging voice told him.

_/ I'm not suicidal, either./_

/ Your arms speak differently./ 

Ryou looked down at his lower arms. From each wrist to each elbow were several deep cuts, formed by the razorblade that was laying near his left hand, covered in blood that was staining the pure white bed sheets. Most of the slashes on his arms had slow streams of crimson liquid trickling from them, while the others were marked by dried blood and were reddening around the edges, a sign of infection. Ryou had become so absorbed in staring at the Ring and thinking about nonsense that he'd forgotten what he came to his room to do in the first place. And while cutting yourself _can_ become an obsessive, potentially deadly habit, Ryou knew he'd be able to stop himself if his life was in danger due to his "hobby." Letting out a soft sigh, Ryou went over to the window and leaned on the sill. As he watched the rain change to light drizzle, he decided it was lovely weather for a walk. He put his jacket on and walked out, leaving the Millennium Ring on his bed.

~~~~~

After about an hour of walking through the park twice, and by the lake three times, Ryou found himself standing on Yugi's doorstep. Without knowing why, he opened the door and entered the game shop. The bell attached to the door dinged, and Ryou heard someone coming downstairs. Yugi's home consisted of two parts: a game shop on the first floor, and an apartment that Yugi shared with his grandfather on the second floor. Ryou felt that having a family member who owned a game shop was an unfair advantage for Yugi, since it gave him first access to all of the rarest Duel Monsters cards that came in. Yugi also most likely didn't have to pay for any of the cards.

Yugi emerged from the back of the shop, clad in socks and with a pair of rather large scissors in his hand. He gave Ryou a look that plainly expressed he'd been expecting someone else.

"Oh. Hi, Ryou." He said.

"Hello." Ryou said quietly, finding it impossible to muster any form of a smile. "Are you busy?"

"No, I was just working on a poster I have to make for the shop."

"Really? Can I help?"

"Sure." Yugi began leading the way upstairs. "Joey and Tristan were supposed to come over and help, but I guess they got held up by the rain."

_/Notice how he asked _them_ and not you. I thought Yugi considered you to be a friend, too?/_ said the ever-present voice in Ryou's head.

_/ Shut up./_ Ryou thought angrily.

_/ I think he's afraid of you. Who wouldn't be? With the Millennium Ring, you're a danger to everyone./_

/ I said shut up./

Yugi and Ryou entered the upstairs apartment. It was the first time Ryou had ever been there, and he saw how small it truly was. The first room he set foot in was the living room, where a large piece of paper was set up on a table, along with magazines and dozens of pictures. Yugi handed Ryou a second pair of scissors, then sat on the couch.

"What is the poster for, Yugi?" Ryou asked.

"We just got a new order of really rare cards in, and Grandpa wants to have a poster to advertise it. I'm making it while he's out-of-town for the week." Yugi explained.

_/ I'll bet he's keeping most of those cards for himself./ _muttered the voice. Ryou ignored it. _/Yugi thinks he's better than you are./_

"So, Ryou. What brings you around here?" Yugi inquired politely.

Ryou shrugged. "I just wanted to go for a walk, and I wound up here."

"You aren't wearing the Ring." Yugi lowered his voice. "Did Bakura do something? Did he hurt someone?"

"No, Yugi. What makes you say that?"

"It's just...if he's done anything, Yami can send him back to the Shadow Realm."

"He hasn't done anything." Ryou felt slightly agitated that his yami was being falsely accused and threatened. "He really isn't a bad person."

Yugi stared at him questioningly. "Oh. Okay."

_/He thinks you're Bakura./_

/Would you leave me alone already?/ Ryou snapped at the voice. Then to Yugi, he said, "Why don't you believe me?"

"What do you mean?"

"You think I'm Bakura, don't you?"

"No, Ryou. I don't th-"

"What makes you think Yami would be able to send him to the Shadow Realm, anyway?"

"Because..."

"Because he's done it before? Because Yami can do anything?" Ryou was managing to keep his voice calm, even though he was beginning to vent his anger. Yugi stared at him in utter confusion. "Why is it so easy for you?"

"Why is what so easy?"

"Everything. Where others fail, you excel, Yugi. Haven't you ever noticed that you've _never_ lost at any game you've ever played?"

"Yes, I have. In my duel with Kaiba in Duelist Kingdom."

"That was a complete fluke, and you know it. Do you know why you're so good at _everything_?" Ryou was slowly advancing on Yugi, who shook his head at Ryou's question. Ryou's voice rose a bit. "You don't? Are you honestly _that_ stupid, Yugi?"

"Ryou..." sadness filled Yugi's large, innocent eyes.

_/ God how I want to gouge those eyes out.../ _Ryou thought morbidly.

_/ Do it./_ The voice urged. _/ Keep him from looking at anyone ever again./_

/ I can't hurt Yugi. He's my friend./

/ Friends trust each other, and it's quite clear that Yugi doesn't trust you. See how he's backing away?/

/ That doesn't mean-/

/ And he isn't wearing the Millennium Puzzle, so that idiot Yami won't get in your way. Now's your chance. Show him the real_ you./_

In a split second, Ryou realized the voice was right. Yugi didn't trust him, therefore he didn't think of Ryou as a friend. This was Ryou's one and only chance to tell Yugi how he truly felt. In that split second, Ryou--gentle, innocent Ryou--exploded. 

"Yami is the only reason you have what you have, Yugi. If it wasn't for him, you wouldn't have anything. You'd be a lonely, pathetic wimp. You'd be a nobody. That's what _I_ am, isn't it?"

"Ryou, think about what you're saying." Yugi pleaded, rising from the couch.

"Shut up!" Ryou snapped. "Why do you always think you can interrupt people when they're speaking? Do you think you're better than everyone? Can you explain to me why I've worked for _years_ to try and make myself acceptable to my father, to you, to the whole damn world, yet all _you_ have to do is put together a stupid golden pyramid, and _you_ gain the acceptance _I've _wanted for so long? You've never experienced true failure, have you? The true feeling of worthlessness. The true feeling of wanting nothing more than to make someone feel all the pain you've experienced in your life. You don't know what that feeling is like, do you? How could you? You've never experienced _true_ pain. True pain is being rejected by people who you thought cared about you. It's having someone close to you be torn away. Do you have _any_ idea what that's like? Let me tell you. It feels as though someone has torn your chest open and ripped out your bleeding, beating heart, then crushed in their bare hands while you're still watching. And when you realize that the person you lost will never return, that you will never see their face again, never again hear their voice, it's like your already crushed heart is being sliced open, slowly and painfully."

"Stop, Ryou..."

"Can you feel it yet, Yugi? No? Then I'll keep going. Eventually you realize that the death of your loved one could have been avoided if only you had done something different. One mistake on your part was all it took to kill them. You realize that if it hadn't been for you, they'd still be alive. At that point, your heart is slammed back into your chest, but it no longer works. You no longer _have_ a heart. It's been torn out, dissected, and shown to the world. It had served its purpose, and so it dies, as does a piece of your soul. You'll never be the same. You will live everyday with the guilt. The guilt of knowing that you _killed _someone. Their blood will forever be on your hands, invisible to the rest of the world, but perfectly visible to you."

"I'm...I'm sorry."

"You can't be sorry. You don't understand yet. You need to feel that pain. I can help you with that."

Before Yugi could stop him, before he could stop himself, Ryou raised the large pair of scissors he still held tightly in his hand, and plunged them into Yugi's chest, striking his aorta. Blood immediately spurted from the gaping hole when Ryou removed the scissors, splattering blood all over everything within six feet. It covered the walls, the floor, and Ryou's face, hair, and hands. Blood ran from the corner of Yugi's mouth, and he clutched his chest as he fell to his knees.

"Well, Yugi?" Ryou whispered.

With his last breaths, Yugi gasped, then said, "I...understand." He fell face-first to the floor, and the bleeding in his chest stopped, a sure sign he'd died.

"Of course you do. I'm sorry, Yugi, but it was the only way."

Ryou stood staring at Yugi's lifeless body for a minute or two, paying his respects. He then went downstairs and left, taking with him the scissors. Since they had been the only things he'd touched, there'd be no evidence linking him to the murder, and his fingerprints on the door would fade before the police discovered Yugi's body. 

It had begun raining heavily again, and the rain washed away the blood from Ryou's hair, hands, and face. Ryou smiled as the blood washed away down the street. Everything he'd just done, he'd done entirely of his own will. He hadn't been wearing the Ring, so he had no link with Bakura. And the voice he'd been hearing had been his own. He felt not a shred of guilt. After all, killing someone was not something new to him. No one would ever accuse him of his crime, either, for the only witness was Yugi. And the dead don't talk, and the innocent hold no secrets...

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Well, did you like it? Didn't like it? Either way, review me. I'll use any flames to light my toaster! Stick around for my messed up parody of Benny & Joon: Yu-Gi-Oh! style and starring...me! Hey, why are you walking away grumbling? Come back! It'll be funny! I swear!!!


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